G.I. Joe

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Storm Shadow and the Baroness
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Featuring the oh so hot Korean Star

Byung-hun Lee

who is aged 38, sun sign Cancer and a gorgeous 5' 8".
In addition to his native Korean, Lee speaks English, French and Mandarin Chinese fluently.

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About the only reasaon why the 2009 movie is watchable.
Certainly not for Channing Tatum taking lead role as Duke or Dennis Quaid as General Hawk.

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ps:
totally funny!
Click on the WATCH Video link!
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/140341

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Yam tarts and Egg Rolls

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Body Combat
So the class didn’t kill me. But I swear, at one point I was all knackered out with a good sweat that starting like I was caught in a torrential downpour not 10 minutes into the start. Then I looked at the clock behind.
Another half hour to go.
Crap.
I couldn’t do the basic push-ups toward the end, because my palms were too sweaty to hold on to any surface, mat or not mat.
Ah well –
But all in all it went well, I lasted the whole hour didn’t I and lived to tell the tale!
I went back in the gym the next day to do my weights (light as it was) because I could only take the class that evening. I might actually go again next week!

Writing
All things in moderation, I’ve mentioned before. Unfortunately, I wish I could attempt something in excess.
The art is slow, …. Well so far for the week, zilch. So I’m making a point when I go back today to at least DO something on my WACOM tablet!
The writing – well, apparently, we will be working on new material this Saturday so I don’t have to prepare anything.
Didn’t I mention?
I’ve signed up to write some more crap for the amateur theatre, The Oral Stage!
Only this time I’m not sure what’s happening, they’re calling this Saturday a ‘workshop’. I wasn’t aware it was one and to be honest if there’s a entry fee, I might just blow it off.
Vinnie is dragged into too, with much goading on my part but we’ll see about the director portion. For the heck of it, why not direct too while we’re at it, no?
:D

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Robot gobol

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Exercise
I’m not sore.
At all.
Even after my minor playful gripes about feeling the pain the past week over the weights – I’m finding myself missing it. Yes, actually missing the slight soreness in places I never knew muscle existed.
Its weird really.
But onward we go. I’ve been looking at a beginners full body workout. It’s a good gradual workout for beginners and set’s up the first 3 months or so. Which sounds great! I just have to get to beginner’s level!

I’ll get to it once I get used to the routine at the gym. I gotta get used to it so I’ll feel terrible if I miss one session (haha!)
I’ll give myself a month then start on the Beginner’s Workout Programme I have.

On the other hand, Dann suggested and I went along, to go for out first ‘class’ at the gym. A Body-Combat class.
I don’t think I’ll make the first 5 minutes. But we’ll give it a go! Got to get ready for that session with AJ and he’s been taking that class for a few months n now! Can’t look like a total wimp now, can we?
A wimp for sure, but not a total one. I’m happy being half wimpy and the rest wussy.


Falling into place
Still clinging to that hope that after I devote this year to improving myself, the rest will fall into place. Or should that fail, I’m happy enough with myself tat it doesn’t bother me … so much.
He’s out there … or they’re out there. Whichever comes first!
:D

Heroes
At least try to be one.
If we can’t seek to achieve, we will never receive.
… oh my- that sounds like a start to a dirty limerick.

Art
I have to refine what I need from the Art Initiative. I’m concerned that I have the least to contribute about my own project I’ve presented. Te making of Gay Personal Oracle Tarot Cards is such a personal journey … its difficult to ask others to comment on the technical side of the project.
Maybe a little change in direction for the art project. I don’t want to compromise my project but I may need a more viable one for the team to work on.

Slam
Still not word.

Amazing Race Asia 3
No word, I think its best to concede the hope my friend, Vince and I made it.
(and no Vince, this ISN'T whining - its updating whatever few readers I have to my blog ... so there!)

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Prose

Never talked to the depths before
Not from my shallow crag
Not from the nook of solitude and the cranny of indifference, have I thought to ask.
Or listen.
Or I listen too hard to the sound beating under my skin, in the cranial of my empty humming silent head.
Or do we call them Echo.
Like the story.
Is the voice of this life a story?
To be continued …

Daisies posing as Poppies

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Choice

This is a place I choose not to pretend.
This is someplace where its ok for everyone else to make or pass judgment based on what I write because in the end its only a perception on words. I cannot fault anyone else for misconstruing intent because there is no intonation nor subtle vocal / physical context in my typewritten words.
And so what.
Anyone can say what they want of me when they read this blog and I shouldn’t really care. After all, nothing here will change their lives drastically. No dissemination of information I post up here will be of major relevance and revelation to anyone.
And so what.
So I can choose to not pretend.

But it’s not the case when you live in the breathing, visceral world.

Growth
Growing older here means, getting more frustration.
And I suppose, growing more sensitive, and in a bad way. Home situations do nothing to aid this. Every morning when I leave the house, its rarely entering the world without some feeling of anger or frustration. And if my day begins as so, there’s a greater chance, the day won’t seem as bright as it should or could be.
Hard to see the sun when the morning clouded over; and if my friends know my home situation well enough … well, getting berated for not getting a better job, a raise, more responsibility and my general incompetence to watch out for myself is generally how every morning begins for me, after breakfast if I’m lucky.

So yes, I do know.
I know how pissed off and begrudging I get when the new girl at work abandons our lunch plans at the last minute to ‘hang’ with the crowd after much cajoling on my part to get her to eat. Even after, I help her out with a small emergency the week before as she bitched about the other staff not helping – and later, not a word of courtesy to me. Its never really one small thing but many small things that lead up to it.
She may have a different story of course, but this is where I don’t care anymore.
Where I realize, to bother caring for excuses and reasons means I’m assuming we could be friends.
When really, there’s little chance of that.

Been that way at work for awhile already.
Perhaps it is me.
No, its me.

So in this perfect world of ours, everyone’s faultless for circumstances obviously out of their hands, yet we continue to bitch when no one else offers a hand in changing things we want to change.

I think I’ll just stay picky about who I like as friends.

I choose not to pretend.

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Latchkey Titles

Across Worlds

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Email
Its interesting.
I’ve been in regular email exchange with an online person from across the planet over the past few weeks. Its … rekindled what I had enjoyed so much about pen-palling back when I was young.
Its different from the impersonal, un-signatured text messages of the many and now. I’ve taken to writing and responding to these emails as if they were written. So more care has been put into the words as well as content over expediency. Full sentences, even.


Presents
Every time I see what I think would be the perfect gift for a good friend or ex – I’m liable to ponder over it and with much luck and finances (hopefully), I’ll get it.
Then I’ll go about figuring if their birthday is around the corner so as to make an excuse to give it to them to stave the headache of actually finding a gift for the on their actual birthday.
I got a few recently, and I think they’d make wonderful gifts for them – its just weird cause I thought I’d be saving money but I can’t keep doing this (LOL!)
Anyways, now I know if I were a gazillion-bazillionaire, I’d actually spend a neat tidy sum on ‘perfect’ gifts for friends and families should I come across it without hesitation.


Weekend
Its was … good and bad.
Saturday, after work I got about to hanging out with a good friend as usual. Saw the pseudo-Digi promotion for Fear Factor Prepaid freakshow. LOL! And saw something I think would make a nice house-warming prezzie for another mutual friend of outs whose moving into a new place over the next few months.

Sunday – I picked up a good friend visiting from Perth.
We were supposed to get to the KL FREEZE MOB … but by the time I drove to KL, car hunt for parking and what-not … it was too late to really truly participate.
Bah! Instead we had a nostalgic time going back to one of our nostalgic school memories. Its been there forever, the PJ A&W’s.
Took her over to the Aunt Tracy’s Mage Café (board games galore). It was good – since it what she does pretty frequently with her friends down in Perth occasionally, board game I mean.
She wants to go back there with more time to actually sit and play a game now. We’ll be going again this Friday night with much anticipation :D

Disappointed
Although I do understand the situation and its totally ok – things happen and you can’t help falling sick, I was disappointed my friends and I did NOT meet up for the Art Initiative scheduled for Sunday evening.
I had confirmed several days before and that early afternoon itself. But alas … things happen. I was really looking forward to it and as you could tell I suppose from my previous posts exactly how enthusiastic I was to get it under way.

Its going to be a little weird. Since logically it would have to postpone to next week.
But its more or less planned that in the coming weekend, there’s a stage script-writing workshop I want to attend.
Its not too tragic I know to make the choice. I know it’s a good opportunity to go for the workshop class (which is free with a small registration fee if I really wanted to and I’m pretty sure the others wouldn’t mind either.
But I also made a promise to myself and them …. That we would hold the Art Initiative for everyone’s benefit and keep to it no matter what because that was the point of it.
To blow it off for something else personal … would make me feel like I’m not giving anything my all.
Like I don’t know where my priorities or importance lie.
It’s a small matter, I will emphasize and I’ll lose little sleep over it when I do make my decision )no regrets after all), but for now … its still in the deciding stage.

Hilight
Met up with a good friend to me and had a ball catching up.
Buying nifty ‘perfect’ gifts for people who matter to me.

Downside
Missing a Art Initiative meeting.
A somewhat stuck-up tattoo reception girl (when helping my friend set up an appointment for his first tattoo)

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Prose
The wheels of mercy were turning
Her life came short within breaths
The water would claim her like a womb
Of sinking, dreary death

Her prayers to mother
Her mother’s mothers and save
Silent reverence reserved for hope
Condemned her to the grave

So she died a witch
No more cruel than those
Who themselves would bitch
With virtues as hollow as thorns

Too late for Tomorrow

Flowery Nipploids

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Morning report

Exercise

Well, I'm sore. Upper body anyways.
Feel good, maybe my form wasn't as gret because it doesn't feel more evenly sore that it did he first time I did the machine assisted weights.
I'll have to pay more attention to form for now before attempting more weights for resistance.
But I'm glad I put in a variable difficulty and speed for 15 minute treadmill.
I think my heart rates wonky though.
Before the run, the machine said it was 130 or so, after it was 172.
High ? - probably.
I still have the rest of April before I attempt to take any pictures of myself now.
(( fingers crossed ))

Relationship Bliss and Cut-outs

I won't say I don't imagine some guys on the street or screen pairing up - and then smile to myself, thinking about how cute a couple they'd make and indulge for all of 5 seconds what sort of couple they'd make.

Yea .... I guess I'm starting to obsess again. Its not wrong ... I believe, but I know its not healthy either. Good thing, it reminds me that I do get lonely sometimes for company.
Good thing I'm recognizing it before it gets out of hand. So I remind myself, I'm doing a lot of things for myself now. Looking, feeling better with the gym (personal goal and vanity indulgence), improving my skills with an art project - ok, so little lazy in doing small projects now but ... thats still something I can work on.
Spending as wisely ans I'm saving should be something I'm getting better at this year.With much luck, I'll enough stashed away (minus taxes and emergency nest) for a holiday at the end of the year.

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Prose

You seek the way out, fresh ground up
I look at where I am, relation
and blood
Bones are dry with magpie tears.

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Newsies

From GU Comics
" In a recent interview with Fear.Net infamous "game movie" director Uwe Boll, in response to a question about a petition requesting that he stop making movies, stated that it would take one million signatures to convince him to stop. [more info] In the days following Uwe "goal" the petition ballooned from 18 thousand signatures to over 164,000.

In response Boll demanded a pro-Boll petition that he expects will also garner a million votes. He then proceeded to call Michael Bay a "[expletive deleted] retard", accuse Eli Roth of "making the same [expletive deleted] movies over and over again", and proclaimed his upcoming game to movie translation Postal to be "way better" than all that "social citic George Clooney [expletive deleted] [that] you get every [expletive deleted] weekend". Boll also stipulated that if movie goers "really look at" his movies they would see his "real genius". He ended his response with the assertion, "I'm the only genius in the while [expletive deleted] business"."

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Ten feet Overboard

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Slumber of Youth

I’m not certain why I’m still have the sleeping habits of a troubled sleeper. This basically means I’m normally convincing myself to sleep. And I can’t seem to sleep for longer then 5 – 6 hours on average., If I do end up sleeping early due to exhaustion or work – I still end up waking up in the middle of the night.
The dark circles around my eyes – well, let’s say they’re a permanent feature now.
(sigh)
I think I’m still an insomniac.
Most material I’ve read mentions hat sleep is essential (d’oh) – but also to rest and build muscle. Like I don’t have enough trouble building muscle already with a high metabolism.
(bah)

Old time
I had drinks a few nights ago, to which after 0 we dud the typical Malaysia thing and went out for eats courtesy of Ming Tien in PJ.
Great catching up.
There’s a lack of the bond we had back in school, but that expected isn’t it. She lives in Perth and I here. We aren’t commonly in communicando but we do ok with the long silences in between. We both have evolving lives and situations that ‘adult’ us away and … well – there’s still hope I guess.
But we’re still cool which is what I want to believe in. So it is.
We’re ok. :D


Gym
Actually looking forward to another session at the gym today. Real excited.
Strangely, my two good straight friends are also at the same gym. One is an old time member that recommended Celebrity Fitness to me and the other, well he just signed up yesterday I believe.
Cool – maybe we can get together this weekend and give tips – since I’m practically starting over again with exercise.

Tattoo
Yea! I designed a tattoo for a good friend, Vince last week for his birthday this Friday. We’re gonna try and get it for him soon since this recommended place (a colleague uses and swears by) is completely booked out till Mid-May!
And we do want a good tattoo artist.
You can see the design in the pic above!
The name in one circle, his Chinese rabbit sign (birth year) and his birthday Aries – and its all in a designed cluster. He’ll probably want it in red – we’ll get there and see. :p


Money
Well, we’ll have to talk about this some time.
I may have spent a surplus this month. In simpler terms, I went over budget.
Even with the freelance work –pay that’s coming in trickles.
- The gym – the drinks (I rarely g out drinking with friends or myself so that’s a treat expense even if it is A LITTLE haha!), the sudden computer repair, the iPod Suffle.

Well –at least some of these were on my list of things to buy in the future already so its already done now rather than later.
I just have to stay away from other luxury expenses.

Crap I just realized I have to file for (income) taxes …. Well guess whose savings that’s going to dwindle down.

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Highlight:
Enjoying the gym and the art initiative coming up this weekend. The tattoo.

Downsides:
Some trouble with the printers and deadlines at work.
Dad still harassing me to get a new job.

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A return to prose and poetry in the nest few posts.

Brunhilda's Closet

Day begins

Workforce
So I’ve been trying to be more civil to the father of the house, by selectively sharing bits of my job with him. The passing year were bad enough when he would moan and bitch about me not sharing my life with him and then accusing my mother of co-conspiring to make him feel excluded in his … yes, he says it loud and clear … HIS own house.

In an effort to be more civil, I share selective details.

Of course now, his ‘suggestions; to get a better job have moved from the friendly, ‘classified ads from the newspaper he clips and cuts with personal notes on them in a folder outside my room’ to ‘suggesting why any employer has to provide a annual bonus or raise necessary for the employee’s’ to ‘heavily suggesting and arguing the case on WHY this job he cut out from the newspaper us better than my current’.
Should I stay at this job just because …
Its not so bad- there are down sides, but there’s also upsides which I like ad I know I won’t get ion the new companies. That’s me being rational.
Me being vindictive would just stay and let him ramble on and get more frustrated why I’m in a dead-end job and that his suggestible efforts are being wasted.
Suggestion has gone too far into the realm of ‘telling what to do’,


Fantasy
I’m pretty glad I’m getting back into the habit of running games.
Sure, its shorter (duration) than the regular games from years back, but we can’t always expect to be the same. Let’s just hope for the best, we can be consistent.
Every other weekend, I would un a 2nd Ed. D&D game now. If on the alternate weekend someone else wants to run something or the group just wants a break – so be it.

Although, it has been brought up that one of the group members wants to run a 4th Ed. D&D game when it comes out in a month! Or rather … in Malaysia, 2 to 3 months from now!
I’ll be looking forward to that of course.
Best to make judgment on the system only AFTER we test it for ourselves, no?


Exercise
Finally started my first session yesterday evening at the gym.
Got 2 free basic training sessions with the trainers at the location, so I acted like a beginners’ idiot. Considering I haven’t been using a gym for … 2 maybe 3 years now, best I really take it from the basics again, lest I forget.
(of yea- I took a progress shot. Going to take one a month to motivate me)

Personally, I know hat it was a lightweight exercise routine. It was really basic stuff with low weights. But there’s still a mini-soreness in my muscles on my upper body today. So I guess it was good, I started slow.
On the other hand, I was nursing a bad stomach. Damn you spicy’ nasi lemak’ I had for lunch! … and it was wrecking havoc with my insides as I worked out.

Longtime
Going to see an old friend today.
I’m the worst at keeping contact with friends from overseas – I admit it. I’m much better at keeping them while their in the same country as me and contactable with a decent phone-call and drive away.
But she’s here.
Priya’s back for her cousin’s (she’s getting married to a guy from the OC – the location not the TV show … if it was the show, I’d be hooking up with some guy on the cast too, no shame, no gain!) wedding!
So I’ll be having drinks with her tonight.
Just to catch up – then next week perhaps, we’ll geek out a bit more.

And I’ve pampered myself.
I’ve saved a little aside so I bought the cheapest iPod I could afford.
One Gi iPod shuffle. Should be great tat the gym, no?

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This is a long post so no prose.

Two feet away from foot

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Adult Advisory
So while channel surfing, within a couple a minutes last night, lazy on the grey living room couch - I found mysefl listening to a couple of minutes of Oprah.
Just a few, but this one guest had a point.
The rest ... well, I didn't stay tuned long enough to understand. She was some sort of self-made Guru of something but thats not quite the point.
" ... write something good about your day. What made you happiest that day ..."

Yea, so its all this positive vibe gobbledegook but to a degree, theres definitely a point. Just to get through whatever personal tough times, we whisper to ourselves 'just a little longer', 'one more pace, one more breath, 2 more minutes, then its done ...' something to get us going just the extra inch or mile.

So what I'm saying here ... is may be I should.
A not so gentle reminder of what and how to see my day.

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Highest Point of the Day
I finished a good friends tattoo design. I'm really happy with it. I'll post it when he actually gets it DONE for his birthday next week.
I finished and sent off one freelance job in the morning. Rushed ... but one done.
Got a free mag.
Saw a cute muscular lecturer in the rain taking his college Architectural class for a visit on my working theatre grounds. Taylor's college I believe they were from. And I wasn't shy about checking him out. I think the whole office knew.
One comment a colleague made was "Tsk tsk .. checking out the lecturer"
My retort "because the under-age students are yours ...."

Lowest Point of the Day.

Most people are on my back today ar work asking me projects all at once. I think they ambush plan just to work my nerves up.
Evidently, its all due within 2 weeks og each other ... and quite soon. Too bad most of them related to each pothers projects so I hav to get them done systematically anyways ... sigh.

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C & C: 2020

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Challenge
I get the impression some philosophies treat life as a series of obstacles and challenges that must be overcome for personal betterment.
At times, it’s a never-ending struggle, but always with the promise something better lies beyond.

So when is it?
… this moment where it becomes worth it. Is the pleasure, reward, self-attainment and knowledge we get merely another step in the challenge? A lure, a goad, another stage?

For those who just enjoy life as it is – are they prepared for the challenges other life theorists speak of? Who is the better example to follow?
Somewhere in-between? Does it work that way? If we try, is it too late to go back once its done?


Change
Still searching for that elusive, decent job that pays reasonably well at a comfortable location from home.
So friends have settled in with new jobs – others are currently on the hunt for another. I guess for the next few years, it will continue to be this way; caught between employment status.
Well, there are those who’ve begun counting their relationship anniversaries well into their 5+ years.
I’ve become …. The single friend.
All I have to do now is wait for the ‘blind date’s.
(hahahahaha) … I wish.

Computer
Yea – turns out my power supply unit konked out. Seriously, major mondo damage. It took out my motherboard. It just had to take out an expensive unit in the computer. At least my HD and files are ok.
But that delays my freelance work.
Not to mention, whatever I was charging is now going into my ‘computer fix’ drain.
( sigh )



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Prose

Casanova
Wishful thinking, I’m beginning to believe.
Little by little, it whittles away.
This dream of being swept and taken.
No more problems, they’re all now forsaken.
Casanova lies.

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