Words over words.

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Into the air
I need to breathe.
Morning sinus's don't help, really.
I need the space - to open up the screaming heightening, frightening voices.

I will rant now - believe you me. Its not my whole state of mind, just a part reallt - but the drowning part.

Spun around
I've spoken my piece to my friend and director in training at work. In regards to a few issues and things, and mostly, just personal forays into the professional which I will try from now on to be more separate about them.
... of the bad:
I will wait for her to speak to me, to apologize with some remorse, regret or understanding. I've said my piece. Its just bad that her first open conflict at her first job is with her friend, but isn't that always the case.
... of the good:
I realize how much of a tyrant I'm NOT when I direct. Surprising, no? I took over one of her rehearsals as a favor (and the cause of some dissent between us), and found out how much I'm enjoying it. I love watching them explore and come to be. I love watching them bring words to life. And I think they just might do it for many others. I believe in them.
And I heard two nicest things out of it - from the productions gasping commentary "Is there anything you don't do?" and "You've got the flair for direction?". I thank you for those words. It means the world to me and as much as I'd like to say I had some part, I really think that it really is more than just my part. Its everybody involved - and I guess thats the allure too. To be of something bigger than who I am, even in the smallest plays. With everyone else.

Debt
In the midst of this drama.
Due to time constraints, rushing deadlines and all that for the largest production here this year, Tunku.
There was an error in printing ... twice.
And I was sent a private reprimanding email and a continuance of discussion in resolving the incursion of a debt through the error of RM 3,200.
Yea ... it sucks when my livelihood comes from my paycheck unlike some amatuers in the theatre industry.
Shit.
This under-manned non profit theatre house - and I pay for this.
I stare at 8 hours at the screen everyday taking care of everything, and I pay for typo's in the text. We have no copywriter to make sure its ok, we have no other designer on production to run through things. Although, I fully accept responsibility on my part, my end and my participation, I do so because there is no other. No other ...
And its irony ... the mispell was "Charity".
I left a "t" out.

Undermanned, - and personally I think they over ordered. Their big musical production last year has hordes in the hundreds (thousands?) of CD's, programme books, postcards, etc ... sigh. Oversight, anyone?

Distraction and Refocus
The day ended well yesterday.
I met my friends Vince and he's a good friend I'm working with to make this World AIDS day charity event.
It was good to work on his short short musical play piece.
Good, I tell ya.
Did I forget to mention he's an Author now :D His firsts published work - a series of horror short stories compiled into a collection of teen horror "The Uninvited" YEA!

By the way: I'll be separating my creative prose work, art?, poetry in another blogspace.
Its easier I figure than cluttering this up.

Greater Dispel

I'll link it up on the side.
Even at the end of the post if I added one more after blogging up.

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postscript: I really want to say how much I loved watching the cast of "System of Professor Tuko" at my one stint at rehearsals. And the Stage manager was awfully helpful too :D (( hugs ))